So much for soon, eh?

yeah, I was going to post sometime. multiple times. but i was just never bothered. hm, so whats happened in the last month or so?
1. My birthday. my mum forgot it was my birthday. I still haven't got my birthday present. fuck her.
2. My uncle died.
3. Funeral. it was pretty sad but hey, life goes on.
4. I've become depressively depressed.
5. I feel like somethings missing, but i don't know what it is. something isn't right nnd it's really annoying.
6. I hate seeing people happy. i'm really sick of it atm.
7. i just wanna kill the world off and get away from everything
8. I'm sick of it all.
9. i am extraordinarily sleep deprived
10. Assignment week is this week and next week. fuck me dead.
11. all of the hot celebs are gay. FUCK. ME.
12. i'm failing all of my subjects
13. im in the process of choosing subjects for next year. next year i'm in my second last year of school. FUCK thats freaky. I want to choose Ancient history, Studies of religion, General Math, Advanced English, Entertainment, Visual art. and maybe a science course but i have enough units already.
14. my favourite song is Bliss by Muse. it's fkn awesome
15. I've kinda lost hope in life. i just wanna kinda maybe sorta dig a hole and hide away for a decade
16. I just don't see the point anymore. i cbf being all positive and what not, it's too much effort for something that's so unnecessary.
17. WEBCAM :D
18. youtube: http://www.youtube.com/theadventuresofmary
19. you know what? i'm really over it all. I think instead of blogging like this i'll use youtube as a diary. it'll be my personal diary. yeah.

Humm.

"It still feels a little of the time (theres no fighting)

Like i've been letting go (and no talking)

It still feels a little of the time (theres no writing)

That you've been good to know (I'm sleepwalking)"

-"Sleepwalking" by faker

Okay, so i had an awesome bog post but now I can't remember what I was going to say, so I'll do something a bit different today.
so I love britney spears. not her music, just how she went from absolutely nothing back t superstar. i'm proud of her. is that pathetic? i don't know.
it's tuesday afternoon at the moment and my birthday is on friday, so i'm happy i guess.
but I went back to school on monday so its kinda gay.
i'm doing a history essay at the moment so i'll blog something worthwhile in the next couple of days.

oh, subscribe to my youtube:
http://www.youtube.com/user/theadventuresofmary :D

ahhh! i'm out to kill you!!

and that was the main basis of my dream last night. twas pretty freaky. and now my stomach hurts.

worked today :D

and I got paid. so saturday morning i wake up at 4am. I don't stop until like 1.30ish sunday morning, only to be woken up again at 8 to start work at nine. to come home at 2, eat, spend a couple of hours on youtube/mibba, to crash at about 10.30 cause i'll be motherfucking tired, to wake up at about 11 on monday morning. What a great weekend i'm going to have :)
so my brother is getting married. his twin got married in january, so it's been pretty hectic for about six months. I wonder when my turn will come lol.
screw that, i need to live a bit before when that comes :P
I got my eyebrows waxed today, and i'm getting acrylic nails tomorrow. for the wedding. i'll try to upload some pics from the last wedding, and then this wedding too.
so yeah, I probably won't post again until monday or tuesday...not that that matters, it's not like anybody actually reads this anyway.
Have you been to a wedding recently? whos was it? what ws it like? got any pictures? let me know :)

super strongbow motherfucker do you wanna can?

1. heard of the midnight beast?
..what's that? you havent? my, where have you been for the last four months?
so yes. THEMIDNIGHTBEAST are hectic. check their youtube page out right here
2. Anywho, youtube has been incredibly annoying lately. They've recently just transitioned over to the new layout and IT SUCKS. basically.
3. I'm on school holidays and am bored as all hell. there is nothing to do. i'm over social networking, there are minimal new youtube videos, im sick of doing everything that I have the ability of doing. I wanna go snowboarding or something, but I can't because i live too far away.
4. it's motherfucking cold!!. Daylight savings finished on the weekend and so it's dark by 4.30 and I hate it, cause I love sun and it's not sunny and yeah. 
5. Supernatural was on TV last night. undoubtedly the funniest episode yet. (i take that back, second funniest.) It's amazing how versatile that show is. there are episodes that I can barely watch cause i'm sitting there shitting myself, and then there are these episodes that I am on the floor in pain from laughing. I hope the show never ends.
6. I want to buy seasons 1-8 of That 70s show and watch them all in order. I can watch that show for five minutes and laugh more than I can in a relatively uneventful week.
7. I watched the love guru yesterday. when I saw the trailer on the television I thought it would be a terrible movie, but it has to be one of the funniest movies i've seen in a while. what, with Guru Pitka and everything. Mike myers is genious.
8. This is my attempt at not posting about Shaun White. however, I stumbed across his facebook today....*sighs in awe
9. My list of the six people I would invite to a dinner party: Meryl Streep, Shaun White, Jared Padalecki, Cameron Diaz, Arj Barker, Prince William.
10. So i'm back on facebook, after my 40 day strike. and it's kind of way shitter than I remember it to be. I'm very much over social networking sites.
11. I've a new found obsession for sunglasses and gladiator heels.
12. Top gear has just started. so i'm gone.

Shaun White...again...

So I got sent this awesome fanfiction-type story about him. It's awesome, i read it in like an hour.
check it out: http://stories.mibba.com/read/250317/Air-Dog (you have to join to read it. which sucks)
After I read this i was like, OMG, shaun, i love you.
but then i watched this interview...http://snowboarding.transworld.net/1000115878/featuresobf/shaun-white-on-60-minutes/ (top vid)
and I realised how materialistic he is. I love his laid back attitude, but after watching that I don't know if it's all fake. In some parts he is as laid back as all hell, but I don't know if he just puts it on. I wish for it not to be true, but...I don't know.
I'm starting to think that in reality, when all the cameras are turned off, he is some kind of sad fuck who all he cares about is himself and his money. It's the complete opposite of what I want to hear, but some things you can't just avoid.

New favourite Facebook Group + more

"Accomplishing something before the microwave timer is out."
so embarassing, yet so true.


A few awesome sites to check out:
mylifeisaverage.com
stumbleupon.com


For Visual art i was thinking about my major artwork and I've realised that it's going to be VERYYY difficult.
it's only thursday night, but have a great easter everybody anyway!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!

I am so out of it at the moment. I don't know if its the weather or what. I just feel the greastest sense of unaccomplishment in my life. is 14 too young to have a mid-life crisis? or does this just mean that I will die at 28? Something's missing, but I don't know what it is. I can feel this empty space inside of me. but i don't know what's meant to fill this empty space. It almost feels like i've gone to do something, and i've almost succeeded. i've almost gotten there, and then bam! it's been taken away. I don't understand why though, what did I do to have to feel so shit. I want to be a snowboarder. but I know I never can. I want to be a film director, but I know i'll never make it. I want to get somewhere, but the places i want to get to are out of my league. It's almost like i'm everything i'm not. what i want is what i cant have. what i can have i couldn't care less about. I don't care about being a model or an actor, a singer...whatever. I want to snowboard. I want to be Torah Bright.  I want to be Shaun White. I want to Direct. I want to be Alfred Hitchcock. I want to be James Cameron. but I know i'll never get there, which hurts the most.

Bored as all fuck

Yeah. the title kinda says it all. so this one will probably be everlasting, and mostly full of shit.
hm, lets see...
1. I'm still not over Shaun White. it's kinda getting weird, and I hope it goes away soon cause it's not like i'll ever have a chance with him anyway. I mean, get real lol.
*sigh. though if the opportunity came up, it would be brilliant. fck, i'd kill for him if I were in that position.
2. I was reading the paper and there was a little interview thing with some guy i can't remember. one of the questions was: you're having a dinner party and can invite six people from the past and present. who would you invite and why?
My list is as follows:
       1. Shaun White because he seems so nice and genuine. and im kinda in love with the guy (coincidentally)
       2. Jared Padalecki because he's hot, and hes that other hollywood crush
       3 4 5. Cameron Diaz, Drew Barrymore and Kate Winslet, because they are such good actors and people.
       *lol, once i caught a fish alive....*
       6. It was heath ledger, but i dont know anymore. It could have been shakespeare. I think that Kate Winslet wasn't originally in the list either. 
3. I don't like my mum. yes, I said mum. not mom. mum. I don't know why, I just don't. but she's going all bitch on me asking me why. but i dont fucking know. she doesn't understand. she is getting all pissed off at me cause of it. i cant help the fact that i dont like her at the moment. it will probably pass, but, i just cant stand her at the moment.
4. Two questions for candians: 1, do you drive like americans or auzzies?, and 2. how do you spell mum(or mom, wherever you're from)
5. Im sick of my life at the moment, I just want to jump like, two years into the future or something. I want to travel. and meet Shaun White. that has to be my biggest priority at the moment. which is kind of upsetting. cause i know it will never happen. or he will turn out to be the biggest dick in real life. which i doubt, he seems so nice.
6. I have school interviews tomorrow. I will get good replies for most subjects, but I will cop shit for math and visual art. Math I used to be an A-grade student....now I'm failing. lol. and I just never do my work in visual, cause i'm so rebel.
7. SONG OF THE DAY: i don't have a song of the day today. i cbf with music right now.
8. SUPERNATURAL COMES BACK TONIGHT!!! everybody rejoice with me the greatness of this.
9. I had a point 9 but i've completely forgotten. I have a song from Jesus Christ Superstar stuck in my head.
10. three more days of school until the easter holidays!! yay!!
11. 151 (i think) days until clockwork comes out!! i don't know if it will be as good as the MI series, or if will just be a shitty rip-off, but regardless, WHO CARES?
12. my dream house: ...well I couldn't find a good enough picture to show you what i want, but it keps me busy for a good fifteen minutes.

Okay, i seriously have had enough of technology. see you all later. *smile

Somethings missing

but, i dont know what it is. I don't feel right and its fucking annoying cause i don't know what it is.
AWESOME SONG OF THE MONTH:
Sleepwalking by Faker. you can check it out **Here**. I have a different version, it has an intro, but oh well. I've known thi song for a while but i've really come to like it lately.
i don't feel like going to school. I'm sick of the place.
AWESOME COMEDIAN ACT OF THE DAY:
Angry(feet) by Tim Minchin. Watch it **Here.**

Have you seen that creepy russian singer guy?
if you havent, you have no soul. watch this:*Creepy Russian Guy*
I'm secretly hoping that that link isn't going to go into one of those "freaky face jumps out of nowhere and screams" kind of things. fuck I hate them.

Until I post again, have a good week/day/month/easter.

Yes, I know i just posted twenty seconds ago but...

New best facebook group:

Pandas are the most racial thing: They're black, white and asian.
lol. That's not the actual name, I can't check because i gave up facebook for lent, but i'll give you a better list when I can go back on it

long time no post,

I'm going to talk about Mortal Instruments again. The fourth book in the series is coming out on March 11, 2011. Apparently the books are going to be adapted into movies. which kinda sucks, because I have it pictured in my head a certain way, and as soon as I see somebody elses interpretations it kind of kills it for me. because that's not the brooklyn, or the forks, or the...narnia?...i know as mine.
So, my point is that I want to be able to direct a movie. I want the world to see the MI realm as I do. or whatever. any kind of world. LIKE, OMG, twilight, that was soooo off what I imagined. I had a floor plan in my head of the swan house and everything. i'll muck around on paint and put one up soon.

Song of the day

Isn't it funny when you're like "OH. MY. GOD. I. LOVE. THIS. SONG"
and then ten minutes later you can be completely over it?
...yeah. Bring me to life by Evanescence is my song of the day. I think. I'm not too sure, it's changed about ten times today. when i started writing this, that song was playing. but now Friends and Alibis by Escape The Fate is, whom I haven't listened to in MONTHS. it's like a trip back in time. i miss these guys. i think my song of the day today will have to be "the song which cannot be named"


..heh, it's  voldemort of the music industry

Mortal Instruments

Okay, so for those who haven't heard of this book series, basically YOU HAVE NO SOUL.
heres the blurb for the first one. if i give you the blurb for the second or third it kinda gives a bit away.


"When fifteen-year-old Clary Fray heads out to the Pandemonium Club in New York City, she hardly expects to witness a murder–much less a murder committed by three teenagers covered with strange tattoos and brandishing bizarre weapons. Clary knows she should call the police, but it’s hard to explain a murder when the body disappears into thin air and the murderers are invisible to everyone but Clary.
Equally startled by her ability to see them, the murderers explain themselves as Shadowhunters: a secret tribe of warriors dedicated to ridding the earth of demons. Within twenty-hour hours, Clary’s mother disappears and Clary herself is almost killed by a grotesque demon.
But why would demons be interested in ordinary mundanes like Clary and her mother? And how did Clary suddenly get the Sight? The Shadowhunters would like to know . . . "


there is this other evil guy called valentine, and I see him as an exact copy of Lucius Malfoy. I don't know why, cause he is only about 35-40 with short grey hair and glasses. but it works for me, so BLEH. Like, most of the time when I read books, i can never really picture faces and what not, but just random blobs. but i can kinda see who they are and what they look like, but it's not clear. haha, you see a body with a giant ? over where their face is.
But for valentine, this character is soo clear.
I wanna know the opinion of other people, for for some reason if you're reading this, send me an email letting me know how you depict the characters in your head

Yeah, about that...

Okay, so I know i haven't posted in a while. i cant be bothered catching up. lol.
just then, I watched the new trailer for eclipse. i'm not too sure about it. it looks good in some ways, but bad in others. I think that:
New Moon will still have better SFX.
Eclipse won't be as close to the storyline as New Moon was, but it will be closer than Twilight.
...the first movie sucked. the second movie kicked ass. this third one will be better than the first, but not as good as the second.
i wonder if they've started on the fourth one yet?

The best facebook groups ever

so I made the most stupid decision ever. I decided to give up facebook for lent. To be honest i havent used it yet. like, not me actually using it. I was thinking about facebook groups the other day, because we were talking about them in class. I'm thinking on my youtube channel to have a "favourite facebook group" at the end of every video. here's some funny ones i've found:

"It wasn't awkward until you said, 'well this is awkward.'. Now it's awkward"
"No i don't care if i die at midnight, i'm not passing on your chain letter"
"I believe studying was derived from the words 'students dying'"
"The guy who discovered milk...what was he doing with the cow?"
"1 friend request...0 mutual friends...WTF?1 how did you find me?"
"Dear rose, Jack totally could have fit on that door with you!"

...yeah they were pretty shit. the ones i'm joined to on my fb are abolutely gold.
i'll get them up for you soon.

yeah fuckit.

Okay, i have a few things to say today:
1 - I Love Shaun White. i'm not as obsessed as i was three days ago, but it's still weird.
2 - i'm in no better mood than i was the other day. I'm still upset for no reason and can't explain it
3 - I stopped eating. I have barely any hunger anymore. i just couldn't be bothered eating anymore.
4 - the vancouver games ended last night. tonight is the first night in seventeen days that I haven't been watching the games and I don't like it. I miss the games. they should be televised for years.
5 - I can't wait for the commonwealth games, just so there is some kind of olympic-similar event to watch.
6 - My master europe trip plan could have collided with the london 2012 olympics, which would've been great, but I have to be a year too young and be doing my HSC at the time. which shits me, cause i could've gone over AND seen the olympics at once.
7 - i checked out the climates of vancouver and new york and sochi. what they consider "tshirt weather", we consider ten layers of pants and twenty jumper weather. I love sydney, but I want to move to canada or london. I hate the cold. 'heh. there goes that idea.
8 - I'm buying a yellow 09 model Lancer evo. if not, a yellow subaru WRX. that suprises alot of people, my weird knowledge of cars.
9 - I had an awesome idea for my youtube channel, but now i cant remember it. damn.
10 - alex day is awesome. "I FUCKING HATE LAUREN!...... pfft, who's lauren"
11 - I love UK accents.
12 - I don't love american accents. but because 99% of our television is from america, I can barely notice many of the accents. cause i'm so used to it. like, i can tell, but you know what i mean. the only ones with the really bad accents are the south ones. alabama. texas.  etc. californians and new yorkers I barely even notice the accent.
13 - I've added to my list of "what im calling my children, and characters in books i write" list. new additions include: Meghan, Shaun, Shane. My list is pretty fkn long now. so is this.
14 - I'll end it here. sorry I haven't posted in the last couple of days, I went back to writing.

Screwed

I feel like shit, and I don't know why. which is the worst bit. theres a bit of me inside that just feels so empty. but i dont know what it needs to fill it. i dont want to be here, im in such a bad state. i know i've been acting really weird lately, i dont know if anyones picked up on it though. all i want to do is wither away and die. there is no point when you dont know what you're living for. i dont know why i feel such an emptiness, but i do, and its killing me. someone, save me while you can. please.

Beginnings

Well, I had a blog, but it got deleted, so here I am, starting from the beginning. Great.
This is my blog. It is an insight to my mind, more than anything. i will post everything here.
I don't know if anyone will actually read this, but i couldn't really care.
One day I will use this for something productive, but for now, oh well.